The Reason for the Season

Of all the ways we could say Merry Christmas, we thought Max said it best.  Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

Sanity Slowly Returns

To our dear friends and family,

Thank you for all of your prayers and support during the last very long and painful month!  We are so grateful for each and every one of you.  As you may or may not know, Joe did not get the job that we wanted. 

Please know, without a doubt, that we are okay.  If you were on my blog yesterday and earlier today, you saw a very raw reaction that included my most personal feelings and thoughts.  I removed the post because we are ready to move forward.  We don't exactly know which direction "forward" is, but we will let you all know when we do.

There are only 2 thoughts that I will re-post:

Sometimes, we need a door slammed in our faces to turn our eyes so we can see something greater.

This poem is my favorite and will be heavy on my mind as we face our future...

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

“You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried you.”

________________________________________

Mary Stevenson, 1936

We have ultimate faith in God.  We know He sees us and He loves us.  We know His plans for us are flawless, and someday we will understand...

A Prayer Answered (as only God can)

As some of you may know, we have been waiting to find out if we get to stay in Tiffin, or if we will need to move on.  The decision is to be made on Friday (in 2 days but who's counting?!) and I am going crazy this week.  With the exception of each Sunday, where I fall apart in church, I have been holding together pretty well.  When our season ended a month ago, we knew we were in for major changes again.  Joe interviewed for the position of head coach on December 2 and 3rd.  He was the first interview, so we've had to wait while others are shown around our gem of a school and town that we have fallen head over heels in love with.  The final candidate is here today and tomorrow, but the AD has told us that he will act quickly and have a decision on Friday-  (BTW~Happy Birthday Friday, Kevin! ♥ Moo)
Now that you are up to speed, I can proceed to my not so subtly answered prayer.  I do not want to wish away time-I know how precious it is.  Instead, I've been praying for ways to pass the time as I get more anxious.  We have so much to lose if Joe doesn't get the job and we'll have a lot of decisions to make.  We remain hopeful because we strongly feel that we are not done here yet.  But there is always that part of us that tries to prepare for the worst case scenario.  That part is the one that I have been busily trying to keep preoccupied with other thoughts so that I don't stray into that territory unless I absolutely have to.
One of my keep busy projects is to fix the kitchen faucet.  It's not broken, per se, but it doesn't swivel.  We are renting our home, and if it were broken, I could just call our landlord.  Since it isn't broken (yet), I thought I could give it a go.  My brother Trevor knows everything about faucets and now I have a plumber in my family, so I can totally take this project on, right?!  So I'm crammed into the cupboard beneath the kitchen sink, trying to contort my body into this miniscule space to tighten the nuts that secure the faucet to the sink.  (Thanks, by the way, to Trevor for an extremely sarcastic description of a bolt versus a nut, which I didn't need!)
Bodie starts yapping like mad, and I think to myself, "Oh good.  Joe's home early and is going to ask what I broke!  This will be fun..."  Then there's a crash in the sink, which is very loud when your face is smooshed right up next to it!  I unfold myself and crawl out from under ready to lash out at Joe for throwing something into the sink for his own amusement.  But Joe is nowhere around, and Bodie is still yapping like crazy, directing his gaze to the window above the sink.  I look into the sink and it's one of my frogs that normally sit on the windowsill.  As I'm thinking, What the *%^!, I notice that there is a bird sitting where my frog had been (yes, a real LIVE bird).  I lean in thinking I have finally lost my friggin' mind and the little sucker starts going crazy!
So, as I'm tripping over all the bottles that are normally under my sink, waving my arms above my head, my dog is barking and this damn bird starts flying all around my house.  (Don't judge unless you've been in this situation!)  We live in a really old house that has awesome original wood trim around all the windows, but it's very drafty.  So we have all the windows covered with energy-saving plastic to try to keep the heat in.  Well, we did have all of them covered.  This bird went nuts trying to find a spot to fly outside.  He hit all the windows, repeatedly, popping and tearing all of Joe's hard work as he tried to get out.  Then the bird found our Christmas tree.  I gotta tell you, bird's wings are loud when they are beating as fast as they can between an ornament covered tree and a wall.  Again, don't judge! 
Please keep in mind that Bodie is still barking like mad and chasing this bird around the house as it tries to escape.  At one point, the bird landed on the windowsill right behind the couch and Bodie got him.  I'm screaming at the top of my lungs for Bodie to get away.  I wish I could say that I was concerned for the bird's safety, but all I could think is, "If I have to clean up dead bird guts or watch my sweet wiener dog eat a bird, I'm gonna throw up!"  It is at this point that Max comes upstairs, completely freaked out, and Mykah comes home from school.
Although we've lived here for 6 months, she has had a hard time making friends.  Tiffin is a small place and all the kids in her school have grown up together.  Much to my dismay, when I turn around to ask her to keep the door open, she is standing there with a friend.  She is standing there with a friend, who she has invited to our house for the first time in 6 months, only to find the dog going crazy, her little brother an absolute mess and her mom running around like a psycho with a broom.  I pause, long enough to say nice to meet you and smile, and then it's back to work.  I put them in charge of holding onto Bodie and giving Max some other pair of legs to hide behind while he cries, "No birds in the house!" 
In the meantime, I tried to call Joe, who was out recruiting, to find out where he is and when he'll be home.  Lucky me- he doesn't answer.  I immediately called my mom, but what's she gonna do from Idaho, and while laughing?!  Fully aware that this story may not seem believable, I pause when the bird finds its way to the bathroom to shoot this video from my phone... (if you stop the music from playing at the very bottom of the blog, you can hear my message to Joe on this video)

The doors in our house are situated such that you have to turn a corner to go out of each, so the bird never went anywhere near the doors.  Since all the plastic covering our windows was popped anyway, I was able to open the window that the bird was repeatedly trying to fly out, remove the screens, then "coax" it out from behind the curtain with my broom, where it promptly flew away. 

I still have no logical explanation of how this bird got into our house.  We don't have any broken windows, but at this point it doesn't really matter.  Thank you, God, for helping me to pass the time!

P.S.  I posted this a couple of hours ago, but I have just gotten home from picking Max up from preschool.  Their project today, NO JOKE, was to make bird feeders out of pinecones, peanut butter and birdseed.  When they finished, the teachers asked the kids where they wanted to hang their feeders.  All of the kids said in the tree.  Except Maxie!  Maxie said in my house!  Thank goodness Joe filled them in on the story when he dropped Max off this morning~ but his teachers just about fell off their chairs laughing when he said his was going in his house!  I think I'll hang it above the kitchen sink.  And the time continues to pass...

A Thank You Letter

To Joe Mike, my dear father-in-law,

I am overwhelmed with gratitude to you for my life.  When you came to visit us last month with your lovely wife, I was given an opportunity to realize the tremendous impact that you have had on my very blessed time with your son, who is the love of my life.

Thank you for the way you see things, because my Joe sees things the same way.  Instead of seeing the modesty with which the farmers in our area live, you see their pride.  Instead of seeing the boarded up doors and windows of Tiffin's old courthouse, you see the majestic beauty that it was before it got too expensive to maintain for our humble town.  Instead of noticing all the empty storefronts, you find the bookstore gems wedged between them and then make friends with the owner!

Thank you for our little Max, who shares your name, but his personality is yours alone!  Forever I'll carry the priceless memory of gazing out from one of the stores we were exploring during your stay only to see 3 of the most precious men in my life; my son and my husband, standing next to the man who made them my treasures-you.

Thank you for loving your wives; Shauna until the day she died, and now Kathleen, who we love and are so grateful to have as part of our family.  Because of your example, my husband loves me and our children unconditionally and with a quiet fierceness that few women get to experience, and I am so grateful to you for it.

So thank you, dear Joe, for all you've given me-  my husband, the wonderful man he aspires to be, for he dreams of being like you; and the father to my children, children who will grow up secure in their father's love, just like your Joey did.

Come again soon!  Max still looks out the window and asks where Grandpa Joe is...We love you so much.  Thank you for being you.

Love, your daughter-in-law,
Little Red

PS~here are some pictures from your trip!

Ummmmm, I think we're lost! Corn maze 1, Borich family 0

Pickin' the perfect pumpkins...

Check out the expressions of each of their faces!

Behind every great man is a great woman (and an adoring child)!

It has been our tradition since we left Pocatello to set up the camera tripod and take a family picture the night we carve pumpkins.  How wonderful that for this night, we were not alone!

Deep in the Season of Harvest

There is a stark contrast between the fall in New York and the fall here in Ohio.  I find myself missing the vibrancy of the colors during the changing of the leaves that we were so blessed to experience for 3 fall seasons in New York.  Here in Ohio, we only get glimpses of the colors we were once surrounded by.  There aren't as many color-changing trees here, but we are in the middle of harvest and I find myself filled with new awe.  The back roads that we so often frequent have been lined with row after row of corn.  It's so flat here that the rows of corn provide the only height variation.  When we returned from our visit home this summer, the flat landscape had been replaced by corn stalks taller than our car. 

We've been watching as the corn is harvested.  The first change we watched was the husks of corn forming on each stalk.  Then the stalks began to fade from their vivid, deep green into a straw-like yellow.  As I watched the stalks change color, I was overcome with awe for the stalks that were yellowing, but still green for the most part.  Like the stalks, I get to watch while my children grow and blossom into the various stages of childhood and adolescence.  Next came when one side of the road had been harvested, but not the other side, or half a field disappeared to harvest. 

Now that my little Maxie is 4, he reminds us of Mykah at 4.  That word, us, is a gift to me-to be able to say to Joe, "Remember when...", instead of "When Mykah was this age..."  Joe and I now share the memories, instead of me filling him in on the years that he missed, but it's yet another painful lesson in time and how quickly it passes.  It was only yesterday when Mykah was 4, wasn't it?  It's humbling to realize how quickly 6 years has gone by.

This coaching life is fast-paced, even in sleepy Ohio.  If we don't pause to watch the leaves change, or the corn harvested, we miss an opportunity that we may have taken away from us.  We can't live how or where we live and say "Maybe next year, we'll..."  Our next year could be anywhere, which brings me to me and how I feel like the now empty fields.

I'm struggling.  I feel completely stripped of all I've produced so far and I long for the time when I'm led into my next season of harvest, because I feel empty.  About 3 weeks ago, I was in a particularly gloomy place emotionally.  I'm tired of the way we've lived for the last 4 years, but I love it, and that statement will be fully understood only by my fellow coaching wives.  As I sat by my friend in church (Joe doesn't get to attend with me during the season here), I found myself unable to stop the tears from streaming down my face, completely vulnerable and deeply longing to know the plans God has in store for us.  Just when I found myself calming, our pastor dropped a bomb.  He said, "If you're praying for God to change your circumstances, stop.  Instead, pray for God to change YOU, so YOU can change your circumstances."  KA-BOOM!!

So, I'm asking for your help.  Please remind me of this when I get weary again.  I'm doing well in school, and I know my degree is a way for me to change our circumstances.  I now also finally know what it is that I want to do with my degree.  I will follow in the footsteps of my mom, who has done so much for so many, for so little in return.  She's been a vessel for numerous people to change their circumstances and I pray that someday I'll be the inspiration that she is.  I don't want to feel trampled down, like the cornstalks that have been harvested.  I want to see it as an opportunity to prepare for the next harvest.

So for now, I'm going to be selfish.  I'm going to drive around these cornfields and be reminded to prepare for the next season of harvest (By the way, this reference in no way refers to babies!).  I'm going to appreciate the various seasons that my little people are in and the harvest of love that my beautiful husband heaps on me every day.  The last thing I want to share today is the scripture that powers me through this crazy life.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path."  Proverbs 3:5-6

The Lighthouse

I am in awe of lighthouses. I love their simple but powerful beauty, especially among the rocky shores and the sometimes rough and dangerous waters of the sea. I think of their beacons of light, circling around and around, illuminating an otherwise dark and intimidating night and feel immediate comfort. When I picture a lighthouse in my mind's eye, I simultaneously experience a feeling of joyful relief as I imagine a weary ship captain's first glimpse of a lighthouse close to his home, knowing that if he just follows the light, it will guide him through the rest of his journey.

Imagine the fear and the confusion and the anxiety that captain must feel when the light within the lighthouse is allowed to burn out. The internal workings of the lighthouse might still function, moving around and around, going through the motions of being a lighthouse, but missing its most critical gift. The lighthouse keeper may even painstakingly put a new coat of bright white paint on the outside of the lighthouse and genuinely feel his attempts to overcome the lack of light are enough to diminish the effects. Next, he plants flowers and shrubs and trees around the base of the lighthouse, and a nice, white picket fence, thinking of how beautiful the landscape of the lighthouse will be during the daytime hours. That has to make up for the burned out bulbs, right?!

The captain knows when approaching it that the lighthouse is close by. Even through torrential downpours and sky high waves, he knows the water well enough, even in the black of night, to sense where the lighthouse should be. He pushes back his bright yellow rain hat and long, straggly hair and clears the salty water from his eyes. He looks toward the shore to the lighthouse, eager to experience the rush of feelings it sparks in him. Tonight, however, its light is completely extinguished. The disappointment he must feel is overwhelming. In the dark, he can't see the new paint or the flowers, he just knows that there is no light to guide him and he must find his own way. Home just doesn't feel like home without the light he knows so well. He knows its comfort in the morning as it lights his way out to a new adventure and he knows the joy it brings him to come home to it during the night after a long journey. In the light of the next day, he braves the rocky shores around the lighthouse to see for himself if it's really the same one he's always known. In the daytime, it is still a beautiful picture, especially with the new paint and landscaping, but he craves the comfort of its light and he knows he won't rest easy until its beacon of light is restored for all to see.

Life can feel like rough seas sometimes and we all need a lighthouse. My favorite lighthouse, aside from God and Joe, has always been my sister. Brooke has always exuded beauty and power. But over the last few years, her light was covered and then let to go dimmer and dimmer until it was almost completely extinguished. I don't have words for how much I have longed for that light.

The best part of this year's vacation was basking in the light that is again shining brightly from Brooke. Siblings (especially those younger) create such a wonderful mix of fury and resentment and loyalty and love, but few have the power to inflict all those emotions at once onto their big sister. Brooke can and I love her deeply for it. Welcome back, B, and thank you for being the beauty and strength and light that lets me know I'm home.

To my new brother, Troy- Thank you. Thank you for not only appreciating the beauty of the landscape surrounding the lighthouse, but for lovingly changing the bulbs that so desperately needed to be changed. Mostly, though, thank you for just being there to lend support during the uncovering of the parts of the light that weren't extinguished, just covered. I can only thank you by showing you the unconditional love that I was raised with, because that unconditional love is what makes my family so special. It's who we are and it's what we do. You earned your place within our family when you allowed my sister to shine once again. I love you, Kevin!! Thank you forever...



With that being said, Brooke & Troy had a baby boy in April and we got to be part of the family celebration of his blessing. Dawson Clem Young is as damn cute as his parents and it was such a joy to finally meet him!



Joe & I cooked for the celebration so that Brooke could spend time with her new mother-in-law, Janice (who is a DOLL, by the way!). Joshie Bear must've been able to taste Mama & Dad's cooking, because he made himself right at home during chow time! In fact, we think he was trying to save some in his binkie for a bedtime snack...



Uncle Troy ALMOST got Maxie on Cracker, but not quite!



The funniest event of the whole day, though, was Joe thinking he needed to learn how to rope, which is Troy's favorite pastime. We were all crying with laughter as Troy patiently tried to show Joe the finer points of roping. Sadly, this wasn't even brought on by alcohol!





All in all, it was a great day and we enjoyed getting to know Troy's family and spending time together as a blended family in Brooke's new home. I love you, sissy! Welcome back.

This & That

This is my section of pictures that I love, but they don't really fit in to one of my pre-arranged categories...

This is Josh taking advantage of some sprinkler time at Nana & Papa's house. Ewwwwww!


Aunt B. and Sydnee Kay


Bodie begging for cake


Uncle Trevor being Mr. Fix-it


Nana & Sydnee


Keylee workin' her daddy while Uncle Braydn watches


Keylee's broken eye...everything is better with a band-aid!


Auntie M. finally meets Dawson!


It just wouldn't be a picture with Grandpa & Grandma Smith if one of my kids weren't crying! Last year it was Max, this year-Josh. Sorry, Dad!

Cowabunga Bay with The Grundys

We had so much fun with Kelly, Chad, and their kiddos at this wonderful water park in Draper.  I only have pictures of Josh because Max was having so much fun that he wasn't in one place long enough to be anything but a blur on the picture! Unfortunately, Mykah wasn't with us either, but we texted her lots of pictures and thought of her all day.  Chad left early, like a trooper, to get us all In-N-Out burger...mmmmmmmmmmm! 




Josh hated this life jacket, so it didn't last long. His favorite things were these little fountains! They were located at the end of the pool that only had a few inches of water, so we let him lose the jacket and just hang out! He was content to sit with Aunt Kelly and her baby bump to receive the occasional squirt in the face!





Contrary to his face in this picture, he also loved the lazy river and we had fun just floating around!



Thanks for this wonderful memory, Kelly and Chad. We loved spending the day with you! 

Trains and a Glow

It's only fitting that Grandpa Joe and Grandma Kathleen took us to the train museum in Ogden, since little Maxie's gene pool is identical to Grandpa Joe's! Trains are Max's new passion and he was glowing all day.   Thank goodness we remembered the Thomas the Train cap!












Josh had to get in on the fun.






In the end, though, he was just plain tired!



Since Grandpa Joe's dad was a train engineer at the Kennecott Copper Mine in Bingham Canyon, UT, we all have a special place in our hearts for the sight of his great-grandsons having such awe and reverence for trains!

Small Town 4th of July

Brooke's new house is across the street from where the fireworks are shot off in Soda Springs. We had a great split 4th, since all the fun at the park was on Monday, but the fireworks were lit on Saturday night. Here are some pix from both days.

New family~ These are my hot new nephews, Damien and Tanner Bananner. I'm pretty sure Auntie M (that's me) scared the you-know-what out of them! Yup, I still got it ;)



"Old" friends~ Thanks for the visit, Suzie. You are one of the strongest women I know and I am so proud to call you friend. (How stupid is my sunburned face?!)



My wonderful parents getting set for the fireworks with Joshie Bear.



I'm such a proud (former) dental assistant mama! My son with a SulcaBrush! Thanks for finding it before you ran over it with the lawnmower, Kevin.



Josh loved the fireworks, but mostly was just content to cuddle with Daddy.



Oh our little Max...We so want him to be a tough, strappin' little boy, but he remains terrified of fireworks.



He buried himself so deep under his blankie when the sparklers came out...



That he fell fast asleep before the good ones even started.



Whataya do?! Gotta love him:)